I have been super depressed lately. I am not sure why or what is causing it. I am assuming it is situational and likely to do with being stuck in the house. Not to mention in the first 2 months of 2021 we’ve lost more friends and family than in all of 2020 combined and I am sure those losses are not helping. Maybe I am scared that it is a forerunner for the things to come for this year, I am not sure. Either way, it’s getting me really down.
I am looking forward to spring for the simple reason that spring always feels like a new beginning to me. Last year spring was not that easy with the mass shooting (a post on the mass shooting from my old blog) in April it was a tough time to get through. This year though I am hoping that things will be better and that we can get outside and enjoy the fresh air and go on some small hikes since I am getting my energy somewhat back with CBD.
One thing I am really keen on and am really excited to do is some geocaching (posts on geocaching from my old blog). We didn’t go last year because in the spring, summer and fall we were unsure with Covid how safe it was and were scared and then in the winter I was too scared of slipping on ice and falling so we didn’t go either. This year though I already have some trips tentatively planned around some hiking areas and some routes we can drive and go geocaching. I am so excited to get back into it and though I still don’t know exactly how safe it is we have come to realize you can’t give up everything. Something things you just have to be careful, so we will take hand sanitizer and whatever else we need and enjoy.
I’m done with being depressed (posts on depression from my old blog. I am sure you are seeing the pattern here..) and know that for me one of the best ways to beat it is good old sunshine and fresh air, with sunscreen and proper clothing and getting out and getting moving. It should help what’s left of my pain as well. Again CBD is doing pretty good at keeping that under control. Now I just have to work on my mood and help the CBD along and get myself more active. Otherwise, I am scared that I am going to fall into a trap again and become more and more depressed.
At least I am fighting it and I will continue to fight it with every breath I take. I have control and I am not letting that control go. It’s mine and I’ve earned it with how hard I have worked over the years to gain it. So no, I am not letting depression take hold. Not this time, not ever.